Something Sweet with Susan

Getting used to life after a heart attack is more than just going back to normal.  I faced fears of the “What if’s.”  What if I have another heart attack while being out of the country?  What if, this feeling in my chest is another heart attack – and on and on. And, many more what if’s. I recognized my fears, but did not recognize it was PTSD I was experiencing. 

Late December, a couple of days after Christmas, while sitting in my living room doing some online shopping for a two week trip we were planning to take in January, the squeezing in my chest came out of nowhere.  It got intense rapidly and I went to get a nitroglycerin tablet.  It’s necessary to keep these on hand but I had never taken one.  I could not get the bottle out of my purse fast enough before becoming dizzy and having to sit down.  After a few minutes and Greg’s help, we decided we should call for an ambulance.  I ended up spending the night being monitored in the hospital and went home wearing a heart monitor for 30 days.  Needless to say, that vacation did not happen.

After my cardiologist went over the results with me, he told me he thought I had experienced a panic attack.  I had experienced panic attacks only a couple of times in my life.  Before experiencing one myself, I used to think that people just needed to put their big girl panties on and deal with whatever problem they were experiencing.  WOW, WAS THAT WRONG!  These attacks are very real. No one should feel bad about needing to get help to learn how to handle panic attacks or any other emotional disorder.

I told my doctor I thought my physical health was better at that point than my mental and emotional health.  We talked about it and decided I probably needed medication and a therapist.    

I started taking medication for anxiety and found a therapist within the next two weeks. My therapist taught me a 4, 7, 8 breathing technique that I use any time the panic feeling starts.  She also used EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) with me to get to the bottom of my PTSD.  Being shocked at the things that came out of those EMDR sessions,  I had no idea the feelings that were suppressed from the day of the heart attack.   Most people are quick to take care of their physical health but slow to take care of their mental and emotional health.  I urge you to take care of the last two or they will cause more physical problems.

“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.”
Proverbs 3:5-6